April 4, 2000
Anne Geddes, baby photographer, says she takes those beautiful pictures because she wants the whole world to take notice that our children are wonderful. Who would argue with her? Yet violence continues to target children. As politicians battle over who is responsible and what should be done about it, a 1993 statistic says in the U.S. a child died every 92 minutes from gunfire.
Things are not much different today. If our newspapers put each event in a headline, we would face 15 - 16 dead children stories every day of the year. No doubt the fainthearted would protest yet, as morbid as it sounds, maybe full coverage of each shooting would produce more than political bickering.
We claim to value children, but not much is said about these 6000 shooting deaths unless they happen to be spectacular or politically hot. For instance, a grown man was murdered because of his sexual orientation and the whole world heard about it but when a child was murdered by those of that orientation, who made a fuss?
Each year, even each day, thousands of children are aborted, abandoned, and abused without much attention drawn to their plight. What does this say about our value system? We North Americans claim to be moral, even religious, adhering to ethical codes based on our convictions. Perhaps it is time to review those ethics, even to take another look at what God says about the value of our kids.
In the Old Testament, God warned His people not to disobey Him. If they did, they could expect horrible calamities upon themselves and their children. These disasters included disease, crop failure and famine, with an emphasis on the suffering brought to the next generation.
God also warned His people that invading armies would come if they did not obey Him. These enemies would ruin their homes and take their children. Risking disobedience put at risk those most precious to them.
Before we think that God values a child only by its potential rather than an actual value, consider this incident from the New Testament. The chief priests and the teachers of the law saw Jesus doing wonderful things. When children shouted in the temple area, “Hosanna to the Son of David,” they were not happy and took their complaint to Jesus.
He replied, “Have you never read, ‘From the lips of children and infants you have ordained praise’?” He rebuked them for thinking children could not be a blessing to God.
Remember also when the disciples considered children an intrusion? Jesus responded with, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”
God holds precious the life of a child. We say we do and, as people created in His image, we are capable of His same protective attitude. Yet actions speak louder than sentiment. Statistics and tiny graves mock our so-called values.
Governments want to confiscate guns, pass more laws, take more control of families. They raise objections at every slaying, just as we do. Yet until the value we place on all human life matches the value placed on them by the One who gave life, it is unlikely anything will change.
What gives us the right to say a child matters only after it is born or born without flaw, or only after it does everything it is told, or only after it fits our plans?
Thank God He is not like that. If He was, none of us would have seen the light of day.
Showing posts with label abuse. Show all posts
Showing posts with label abuse. Show all posts
Monday, November 20, 2017
Wednesday, August 23, 2017
To spank or not to spank? .......... Parables 631
March 2, 1999
My friend Wayne could be a prophet. Months ago, he wrote a short fiction story about a family caught in a law that did not allow spanking. A few weeks ago, Jordan Riak of Oakland California, made headlines in his one-man crusade to stamp out spanking.
Riak says, “I think that every time a little boy is spanked, it gives him his first lesson in becoming a beater, and every time a little girl is spanked, it gives her the first lesson that people who love you slap you around.” Does he have the right idea?
Wayne’s story takes a look at what could happen. A dad takes his children to their vehicle in a public parking lot. His daughter disobeys his warning and runs in front of a speeding car. He yanks her out of danger and instinctively gives her a swat on her backside. But spanking is against the law and someone sees him. He is arrested and charged.
Wayne writes from frustration. Who decided you can reason with small children? Most research says they cannot reason until they are about ten years old. While parents hope they will understand why some things are wrong or dangerous, until ten or so, they have difficulty with rationale. However, even a two-year old is capable of trusting mom and dad to guide them.
The downside is that everyone knows parents do not need to teach their children how to misbehave. The question is, how do you encourage them to do right? And what do you do when they refuse? From an adult perspective, reasoning seems kinder but if a child is too young to reason, then all they hear are mere words, easily shut out.
Riak equates spanking with beating children and slapping them around. Wayne argues loving parents have a different motive. Child abusers are frustrated and out of control. They want to harm not help. Loving parents are concerned that their children learn how to do right, make wise choices. They do not beat or slap but want the very best for them. They reinforce obedience with praise and discourage rebellion and disobedience (which is not the same as a childish mistake) with uncomfortable consequences.
A parallel might be a toddler and a hot stove. Parents can talk and reason, but no matter how strong their warnings, some little ones will touch it anyway. When they do, sudden pain impresses them that Mom is right; a hot stove is not safe.
From the child’s side, the Bible says, “Obey your parents . . . that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” This was directly applied to a family that taught their children to obey instantly (no small feat). It paid off. One summer day, as their sitter watched them in the family pool, she noticed a flash and a sagging overhead wire. She yelled, “Get out of the pool, right now!” They did (most would not) and moments later, the hot wire fell into the pool. Long life and obedience are a team.
It didn’t work that way at the end of Wayne’s fiction story. As the press sweeps into the family yard, insisting on an interview, the children are out of control. Dad tells them to stop but they insist on playing with some electrical equipment. He is frantic yet they ignore his words.
The reporters realize this is the test. Will this man lose his cool again and spank his children? Right in front of their cameras? They taunt him. The children laugh. Their mother sides with the reporters. What will he do? As they harass him, the children freeze. All action is in slow motion. Dad rushes toward them, silently screaming — but too late — both are electrocuted.
It is only a story but Wayne makes a point. Love is aware of the importance of obedience. Love does not beat children but teaches and corrects them, firmly and with necessary actions.
Surveys say about 90% of children are spanked. However, 90% do not grow up to be abusive husbands or abused wives. Is spanking taking the rap when the real culprit is something else? Maybe we have forgotten the importance of obeying authority. And maybe we have lost the true definition of love.
My friend Wayne could be a prophet. Months ago, he wrote a short fiction story about a family caught in a law that did not allow spanking. A few weeks ago, Jordan Riak of Oakland California, made headlines in his one-man crusade to stamp out spanking.
Riak says, “I think that every time a little boy is spanked, it gives him his first lesson in becoming a beater, and every time a little girl is spanked, it gives her the first lesson that people who love you slap you around.” Does he have the right idea?
Wayne’s story takes a look at what could happen. A dad takes his children to their vehicle in a public parking lot. His daughter disobeys his warning and runs in front of a speeding car. He yanks her out of danger and instinctively gives her a swat on her backside. But spanking is against the law and someone sees him. He is arrested and charged.
Wayne writes from frustration. Who decided you can reason with small children? Most research says they cannot reason until they are about ten years old. While parents hope they will understand why some things are wrong or dangerous, until ten or so, they have difficulty with rationale. However, even a two-year old is capable of trusting mom and dad to guide them.
The downside is that everyone knows parents do not need to teach their children how to misbehave. The question is, how do you encourage them to do right? And what do you do when they refuse? From an adult perspective, reasoning seems kinder but if a child is too young to reason, then all they hear are mere words, easily shut out.
Riak equates spanking with beating children and slapping them around. Wayne argues loving parents have a different motive. Child abusers are frustrated and out of control. They want to harm not help. Loving parents are concerned that their children learn how to do right, make wise choices. They do not beat or slap but want the very best for them. They reinforce obedience with praise and discourage rebellion and disobedience (which is not the same as a childish mistake) with uncomfortable consequences.
A parallel might be a toddler and a hot stove. Parents can talk and reason, but no matter how strong their warnings, some little ones will touch it anyway. When they do, sudden pain impresses them that Mom is right; a hot stove is not safe.
From the child’s side, the Bible says, “Obey your parents . . . that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” This was directly applied to a family that taught their children to obey instantly (no small feat). It paid off. One summer day, as their sitter watched them in the family pool, she noticed a flash and a sagging overhead wire. She yelled, “Get out of the pool, right now!” They did (most would not) and moments later, the hot wire fell into the pool. Long life and obedience are a team.
It didn’t work that way at the end of Wayne’s fiction story. As the press sweeps into the family yard, insisting on an interview, the children are out of control. Dad tells them to stop but they insist on playing with some electrical equipment. He is frantic yet they ignore his words.
The reporters realize this is the test. Will this man lose his cool again and spank his children? Right in front of their cameras? They taunt him. The children laugh. Their mother sides with the reporters. What will he do? As they harass him, the children freeze. All action is in slow motion. Dad rushes toward them, silently screaming — but too late — both are electrocuted.
It is only a story but Wayne makes a point. Love is aware of the importance of obedience. Love does not beat children but teaches and corrects them, firmly and with necessary actions.
Surveys say about 90% of children are spanked. However, 90% do not grow up to be abusive husbands or abused wives. Is spanking taking the rap when the real culprit is something else? Maybe we have forgotten the importance of obeying authority. And maybe we have lost the true definition of love.
Friday, September 9, 2016
Matters of the Heart .......... Parables 482
August 29, 1995
Every few days authorities arrest someone for physically or sexually abusing their own or someone else’s children. Susan Smith went even farther when she killed her two little boys. She claims emotional distress yet who can help but question the actual condition of her heart?
Statistics reveal alarming increases in child abuse. While raising children can bring exasperation, understanding a total lack of tender-heartedness is difficult. Any kind of abuse sadly illustrates the depths to which human beings can fall.
What can be done to prevent or stop such abuse? Education may help. Punishment, or the threat of it, might deter a few. It is more imperative that something is done at the heart level to defuse whatever it is at the core of our being that makes too many of us tick like time bombs.
Human nature is complex. For instance, why do some people beat their kids yet that behavior appalls others? In God’s sight, what is the difference? Why does He say ALL need forgiveness and salvation from sin when some are obviously more in need of it than others?
A diagram helped me understand something about the condition of humanity as God sees us. Draw the left half of a heart. Since the heart represents a person, label it “ME.” Finish the right side with a vertical line. This line shows something is missing, which I will explain shortly. At the top of the line, put a “zero.” This represents goodness or zero evil — no badness at all.
Above the half heart shape, draw a horizontal line extending left from the zero to the edge of the page. This line represents human potential for doing wrong. We must admit evil’s appeal.
Human attitudes, motives, speech and general behavior will be somewhere along this line. People who maybe tell only a few white lies, seldom say mean things and are generally kind and law-abiding, could be called “good” and will be close to the zero.
Others express their tendency toward evil in more serious activities such as robbing banks, mugging people or cheating on their income tax. Their mark would be farther away from the “zero.” Depending on individual opinion, Hitler and Paul Bernardo would be farther left than these or than average people. Some might mark them right off the page.
On your diagram, draw the other half of the heart with a dotted line. Draw another line above the heart going to the right of the “zero.” This represents human potential to be godly or like God, an actual possibility because He made us in His image.
However, the Bible says we fall short of getting any marks on the godliness side — because of the stuff on the other line. Any bad deed spoils the image we were created to reflect. Looking at the diagram, it is easy to see we are incomplete. Without God’s help, the best we can do is reach half our potential and, as far as God measures, it is the wrong half.
God loves us too much to leave us like that. He offered a way we can move beyond the middle line when He sent His Son to pay our penalty for everything marked on the left side. Even more, He put all of that bad stuff on Christ, removing it from us “as far as the east is from the west.” Those who believe in Him are assured that God “remembers their sin no more.”
Secondly, God takes the righteousness of Christ and puts it on those who believe. What an incredible trade! “God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God.”
Even more amazing, God gives His eternal life and power to those who trust Christ. Because of His presence in them, they have a new nature and the potential to extend that line out to the right toward godliness. While evil is still possible (God never removes our power of choice), its power to condemn us before God is broken — and He makes our hearts whole.
As for child abuse, according to the Bible, response to Christ means “the hearts of the fathers will be turned toward their children.” He becomes a potent cure, right where it is needed.
Every few days authorities arrest someone for physically or sexually abusing their own or someone else’s children. Susan Smith went even farther when she killed her two little boys. She claims emotional distress yet who can help but question the actual condition of her heart?
Statistics reveal alarming increases in child abuse. While raising children can bring exasperation, understanding a total lack of tender-heartedness is difficult. Any kind of abuse sadly illustrates the depths to which human beings can fall.
What can be done to prevent or stop such abuse? Education may help. Punishment, or the threat of it, might deter a few. It is more imperative that something is done at the heart level to defuse whatever it is at the core of our being that makes too many of us tick like time bombs.
Human nature is complex. For instance, why do some people beat their kids yet that behavior appalls others? In God’s sight, what is the difference? Why does He say ALL need forgiveness and salvation from sin when some are obviously more in need of it than others?
A diagram helped me understand something about the condition of humanity as God sees us. Draw the left half of a heart. Since the heart represents a person, label it “ME.” Finish the right side with a vertical line. This line shows something is missing, which I will explain shortly. At the top of the line, put a “zero.” This represents goodness or zero evil — no badness at all.
Above the half heart shape, draw a horizontal line extending left from the zero to the edge of the page. This line represents human potential for doing wrong. We must admit evil’s appeal.
Human attitudes, motives, speech and general behavior will be somewhere along this line. People who maybe tell only a few white lies, seldom say mean things and are generally kind and law-abiding, could be called “good” and will be close to the zero.
Others express their tendency toward evil in more serious activities such as robbing banks, mugging people or cheating on their income tax. Their mark would be farther away from the “zero.” Depending on individual opinion, Hitler and Paul Bernardo would be farther left than these or than average people. Some might mark them right off the page.
On your diagram, draw the other half of the heart with a dotted line. Draw another line above the heart going to the right of the “zero.” This represents human potential to be godly or like God, an actual possibility because He made us in His image.
However, the Bible says we fall short of getting any marks on the godliness side — because of the stuff on the other line. Any bad deed spoils the image we were created to reflect. Looking at the diagram, it is easy to see we are incomplete. Without God’s help, the best we can do is reach half our potential and, as far as God measures, it is the wrong half.
God loves us too much to leave us like that. He offered a way we can move beyond the middle line when He sent His Son to pay our penalty for everything marked on the left side. Even more, He put all of that bad stuff on Christ, removing it from us “as far as the east is from the west.” Those who believe in Him are assured that God “remembers their sin no more.”
Secondly, God takes the righteousness of Christ and puts it on those who believe. What an incredible trade! “God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God.”
Even more amazing, God gives His eternal life and power to those who trust Christ. Because of His presence in them, they have a new nature and the potential to extend that line out to the right toward godliness. While evil is still possible (God never removes our power of choice), its power to condemn us before God is broken — and He makes our hearts whole.
As for child abuse, according to the Bible, response to Christ means “the hearts of the fathers will be turned toward their children.” He becomes a potent cure, right where it is needed.
Monday, December 14, 2015
Responsibilities and Law Suits ............. Parables 365
April 13, 1993
A week or so ago I used lawsuits against computer companies to illustrate our human tendency to blame problems on others who did not directly cause them. At least one sufferer of repetitive stress injuries took offense. My apologies. These Parables are not intended to belittle people in pain but to point to God who loves us and has tremendous power to bring good from even the worst things that happen to us.
RSI is a serious physical condition and can lead to work loss and even permanent disability. Some are not aware that doing the same task over and over (particularly at work stations that force unsafe posture) can be so damaging. Employers need to provide more information and safer working conditions. Those prone to RSI need to take every precaution possible.
While I could further explore medical and legal ramifications, this column is intended to bring out the biblical perspective on situations like these. For instance, what does God say about employers who ignore worker-safety? And what about the pain felt by those injured? Or the added frustration whenever no one seems to care about their situation?
God’s Word directly addresses these concerns. Surprisingly, He offers warnings, instruction and hope to BOTH sides of the issue.
Exploitation is not a new thing. In New Testament times when the Romans ruled Israel, it was legal for Roman soldiers to force bystanders to carry their equipment up to one mile. They were also known to intimidate and extort money from helpless people.
Soldiers were not the only abusers. Masters beat their slaves, employers overworked and underpaid their servants, and leaders exploited their followers.
Even though God gave many rules regarding these relationships, people didn’t obey them just like they don’t obey Him today. Yet God offered hope to these cruel and heartless people. John the Baptist warned them to repent and Jesus offered forgiveness if they did.
Injured people were also given instruction and hope. First God warned them not to retaliate. Jesus put it this way, “You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’ But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles” (Matt. 5:38-41).
God’s people were expected to do their jobs in faith with Christlike attitudes: “Bond servants, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ” (Ephesians 6:5). They were to do this regardless of how they were treated: “...submit yourselves to your masters with all respect, not only to those who are good and considerate, but also to those who are harsh.... if you suffer for doing good and you endure it, this is commendable before God (1 Peter 2).
This seems unfair but God is more interested that suffering people do not sin by returning evil with evil. Sin will only damage us even more. Instead, He wants us to come to Him with our pain. He suffered far more than we ever will so He knows how we feel. When we reach out to Him, He gives strength to endure and sometimes even lifts the pain or heals the problem. Furthermore, if we cooperate, He promises to use suffering to develop and strengthen our character (1 Peter 5:10).
Exploitation and neglect of others, with its resulting pain, confirms that our world is not the way God intended it to be. Harm comes when people disobey God and sin against one another. Human techniques seem good in that they may constrain the abusive and give temporary consolation to those who are injured. Yet sin is a spiritual problem and whether a person is a perpetrator or a victim of it, the best way to deal with sin’s devastation is through spiritual methods.
According to God, the first step is full surrender to Him.
A week or so ago I used lawsuits against computer companies to illustrate our human tendency to blame problems on others who did not directly cause them. At least one sufferer of repetitive stress injuries took offense. My apologies. These Parables are not intended to belittle people in pain but to point to God who loves us and has tremendous power to bring good from even the worst things that happen to us.
RSI is a serious physical condition and can lead to work loss and even permanent disability. Some are not aware that doing the same task over and over (particularly at work stations that force unsafe posture) can be so damaging. Employers need to provide more information and safer working conditions. Those prone to RSI need to take every precaution possible.
While I could further explore medical and legal ramifications, this column is intended to bring out the biblical perspective on situations like these. For instance, what does God say about employers who ignore worker-safety? And what about the pain felt by those injured? Or the added frustration whenever no one seems to care about their situation?
God’s Word directly addresses these concerns. Surprisingly, He offers warnings, instruction and hope to BOTH sides of the issue.
Exploitation is not a new thing. In New Testament times when the Romans ruled Israel, it was legal for Roman soldiers to force bystanders to carry their equipment up to one mile. They were also known to intimidate and extort money from helpless people.
Soldiers were not the only abusers. Masters beat their slaves, employers overworked and underpaid their servants, and leaders exploited their followers.
Even though God gave many rules regarding these relationships, people didn’t obey them just like they don’t obey Him today. Yet God offered hope to these cruel and heartless people. John the Baptist warned them to repent and Jesus offered forgiveness if they did.
Injured people were also given instruction and hope. First God warned them not to retaliate. Jesus put it this way, “You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’ But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles” (Matt. 5:38-41).
God’s people were expected to do their jobs in faith with Christlike attitudes: “Bond servants, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ” (Ephesians 6:5). They were to do this regardless of how they were treated: “...submit yourselves to your masters with all respect, not only to those who are good and considerate, but also to those who are harsh.... if you suffer for doing good and you endure it, this is commendable before God (1 Peter 2).
This seems unfair but God is more interested that suffering people do not sin by returning evil with evil. Sin will only damage us even more. Instead, He wants us to come to Him with our pain. He suffered far more than we ever will so He knows how we feel. When we reach out to Him, He gives strength to endure and sometimes even lifts the pain or heals the problem. Furthermore, if we cooperate, He promises to use suffering to develop and strengthen our character (1 Peter 5:10).
Exploitation and neglect of others, with its resulting pain, confirms that our world is not the way God intended it to be. Harm comes when people disobey God and sin against one another. Human techniques seem good in that they may constrain the abusive and give temporary consolation to those who are injured. Yet sin is a spiritual problem and whether a person is a perpetrator or a victim of it, the best way to deal with sin’s devastation is through spiritual methods.
According to God, the first step is full surrender to Him.
Wednesday, October 21, 2015
Self-Abuse & Warranties ................ Parables 342
November 3, 1992
A trouble-shooter for a major implement dealer tells a story about some complaints they received on a new tractor. While this tractor was receiving rave responses from nearly everyone, there were a few farmers from one part of the country who thought it was the worst model on the market. They kept wearing out gear boxes. After replacing the defective parts under warranty, sometimes two or three times for the same farmer, the company decided to send their trouble-shooter to find out what was happening.
This fellow discovered these farmers clearing land, including tree stump removal. They fastened a long chain around each stump, hooked the other end to the tractor, put it in gear, then took off at full speed. Just before the tractor reached the end of the chain and reared into the air, the driver jumped off. If the stump was not yanked free, they repeated the process.
Now any farmer, and a few of us who are not farmers, know that tractors and gear boxes are not made to withstand such treatment. After so much of it, the equipment will break down. The trouble-shooter had to carefully explain that in order to resolve the problem the farmers were having with their tractors. He said he now uses the story when folks come to him with their problems, explaining that we too break down because so many of us abuse our lives like those farmers abused their tractors.
He says people were originally made to live in a perfect environment with a relationship of dependence on God to meet all their needs. Instead, we live in an imperfect world where God is left out of most of our lives, but because we were not designed for such living conditions, we need Him even more than Adam and Eve did in paradise.
We see the wreckage all around: shattered marriages, dysfunctional families, corrupt governments, business failures, crime, and irresponsible behavior; people living independently from their Maker. Even though suggestions and plans for what to do instead-of-God are almost as numerous as the negative situations, only one works: the plan for which we were designed.
According to the story of creation in Genesis, God intended man and women not only to depend on Him but to reflect His image. When humanity determined to act apart from God, sin entered the picture and the image was mangled. Oh, it can still be seen whenever people act in kindness or mercy, but independence and the effects of sin have marred our hearts, minds, choices, and life as it was intended to be.
In love and concern for us, our Manufacturer also offers a warranty regarding our defective parts, ruined by sin. He offers a “new heart” and to put a “new spirit within,” to “take the heart of stone out” and give us a heart that is soft towards Him and towards living as He made us to live.
He warns us “do not be confirmed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” That means a change in thinking made possible by receiving His wisdom and “the mind of Christ” (1 Corinthians 2:16).
As for our choices, so seldom do we consult God and we so easily make selfish decisions but the Bible tells us if we turn to God, He works in us “both to will and to do His good pleasure.”
God remembers that we live best in paradise and says that someday, “the creation itself also will be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God.” Those who go back to their Manufacturer for replacement hearts, minds and decision-making abilities will undergo a radical transformation, but so will this world someday be radically transformed, “a new heaven and new earth.” In the meantime, we are responsible to stop abusing ourselves and live life the way He intended.
A trouble-shooter for a major implement dealer tells a story about some complaints they received on a new tractor. While this tractor was receiving rave responses from nearly everyone, there were a few farmers from one part of the country who thought it was the worst model on the market. They kept wearing out gear boxes. After replacing the defective parts under warranty, sometimes two or three times for the same farmer, the company decided to send their trouble-shooter to find out what was happening.
This fellow discovered these farmers clearing land, including tree stump removal. They fastened a long chain around each stump, hooked the other end to the tractor, put it in gear, then took off at full speed. Just before the tractor reached the end of the chain and reared into the air, the driver jumped off. If the stump was not yanked free, they repeated the process.
Now any farmer, and a few of us who are not farmers, know that tractors and gear boxes are not made to withstand such treatment. After so much of it, the equipment will break down. The trouble-shooter had to carefully explain that in order to resolve the problem the farmers were having with their tractors. He said he now uses the story when folks come to him with their problems, explaining that we too break down because so many of us abuse our lives like those farmers abused their tractors.
He says people were originally made to live in a perfect environment with a relationship of dependence on God to meet all their needs. Instead, we live in an imperfect world where God is left out of most of our lives, but because we were not designed for such living conditions, we need Him even more than Adam and Eve did in paradise.
We see the wreckage all around: shattered marriages, dysfunctional families, corrupt governments, business failures, crime, and irresponsible behavior; people living independently from their Maker. Even though suggestions and plans for what to do instead-of-God are almost as numerous as the negative situations, only one works: the plan for which we were designed.
According to the story of creation in Genesis, God intended man and women not only to depend on Him but to reflect His image. When humanity determined to act apart from God, sin entered the picture and the image was mangled. Oh, it can still be seen whenever people act in kindness or mercy, but independence and the effects of sin have marred our hearts, minds, choices, and life as it was intended to be.
In love and concern for us, our Manufacturer also offers a warranty regarding our defective parts, ruined by sin. He offers a “new heart” and to put a “new spirit within,” to “take the heart of stone out” and give us a heart that is soft towards Him and towards living as He made us to live.
He warns us “do not be confirmed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” That means a change in thinking made possible by receiving His wisdom and “the mind of Christ” (1 Corinthians 2:16).
As for our choices, so seldom do we consult God and we so easily make selfish decisions but the Bible tells us if we turn to God, He works in us “both to will and to do His good pleasure.”
God remembers that we live best in paradise and says that someday, “the creation itself also will be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God.” Those who go back to their Manufacturer for replacement hearts, minds and decision-making abilities will undergo a radical transformation, but so will this world someday be radically transformed, “a new heaven and new earth.” In the meantime, we are responsible to stop abusing ourselves and live life the way He intended.
Wednesday, August 6, 2014
Freedom from abuse ............................. Parables 153
A young, very pregnant girl sits sobbing in a chilly courtroom. Her boyfriend is charged with assault. She is afraid she will lose him to a prison cell. His only possible defense is that the judge will have mercy. She fears for her future. What will happen to her? What will happen to her baby, and to their other small child? How will she ever manage alone?
A tragedy? Yes, but the worst is yet to come. The boyfriend’s victim was this very girl.
Not an uncommon situation. Two lonely, perhaps downtrodden, people are attracted to one another. They meet one another’s needs for a time, but somehow the relationship becomes lop-sided.
One has a more dominant personality or it stronger in some way. The other, afraid of not being needed or wanted, chooses to remain under that dominance rather than face life without someone, anyone. Sadly, she became the giver, he only takes.
For such victims, the fear of rejection and being alone is greater than the fear of abuse, ridicule and repeated injury. Some will endure whatever they are dealt just to belong to someone, to have some sense of security. This girl, and countless like her, is held in emotional bondage.
The situation can be reversed too. Men hold no monopoly on dominance and abuse; women are not always the weaker ones. Whatever the case, God never intended human relationships to be lop-sided. It seems breaking free and becoming independent would be the only way out, but such a yoke is difficult to break. Rarely can the insecure person stand alone. Without help, they don’t have the resources.
There are no pat answers — but there is an answer. It does not lie in seeking independence but in finding a new and gentle master, one who gives instead of takes, one who frees instead of binds.
The only Master I know of that gives freedom is the One who said, “You shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free... I am the truth!”
Yes, Jesus Christ was speaking of freedom from the bondage of unbelief and sin, but in that freedom, there is also a transfer of dependency — from whatever bondage that holds us to the One who promises genuine freedom.
When a weak and insecure person attaches themselves to someone stronger, the strong one may take exploit their weakness, but Jesus never’ does that. He not only takes care of all our needs, He loves us unconditionally, accepts us fully and protects us with His strength. He promises abundant, fruitful lives and even makes us partners with Him in His work. We are needed but not exploited.
He graciously supplies all — so we can do whatever He asks us to do! (See Corinthians 9:8) With Christ as the supply, we can even give. Takers can take all they want and we never run out — His supply is inexhaustible.
Sounds too good to be true? If I didn’t know that it was true in my own life, I would think so, but Jesus has never failed me. There are times when pressures are more than I can bear, when people make demands that are beyond my patience and my capacity. But He gives strength and renewed strength. His patience is available that I might choose it rather than cave in.
Jesus invites those who struggle, “Come to me, all you who are weary and heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you (instead of the one you are carrying) and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden it light.”
The Bible encourages any who suffer to “Ask for wisdom” — God gives it to all who ask in faith. Surely, we need His wisdom to find our way through any difficulty, including that of a lop-sides relationship.
Life may not hold extreme trials or crippling bondage right now, but God is available in good times. Anyone who desires His freedom and peace can find it through a personal relationship with the Prince of Peace. “If the Son shall set you free, you shall be free indeed.”
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